From Chaos to Calm: Day Sixty-Four
Keeping the Romance Alive
Scripture Memory: “My lover is dark and dazzling, better than ten thousand others! … His mouth is sweetness itself; he is desirable in every way. Such, O women of Jerusalem, is my lover, my friend.” Song of Songs 5: 10, 16
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I know we have discussed your relationship with your husband already, but this is such an important topic, that I felt like we should touch on it again. After all, we have been in the bedroom for the last few days, right?
In the early stages of marriage, romance and intimacy usually come pretty easily. As time progresses, however, life often gets in the way of any passion you may have felt in the beginning. A solid marriage is going to be solid in the bedroom as well as out. How can we as wives keep the romance alive when it seems like life is always working against us?
One thing I have found that keeps my heart in tune is to find reasons to praise my husband to friends (or strangers)! I love sharing our love story with others and I have found that no matter how frustrated I may be feeling with him, if I share our love story (how we met and fell in love, etc.) my heart is always softened toward him. Remembering why you love your husband is an effective aphrodisiac!
If you are struggling to find time to connect with your husband, the first step to rekindling the romance is to identify things that make be preventing you and your husband from having a close, intimate relationship where romance still abounds. Romance is not just about sex. Romance is about the emotional connection as well as the physical connection.
What are some problems that may be keeping you and your husband from being fully connected?
- lack of time
- financial stress
Hopefully over the course of the last few weeks you have learned to love your husband for who he is and you have let go of old hurts and resentments. If not, spend more time in prayer about those things that have built a wall around you and your heart that are preventing you from being completely and totally in love with your husband. Our husbands and families deserve the best of our lives and living with bitterness, anger, and resentment are not the best we have to offer!
What are some ways you can overcome other obstacles that may be preventing you from being physically close to your husband? If children are a problem, make sure the children are in bed at the same time every night. As little ones grow from babies to toddlers and later to adolescents this gets easier. Babies may need you unexpectedly, but that is to be expected and part of the joy of raising children! In the mean time, do everything that is within your control to ensure that you and your husband have time together each night.
If you are like me, time and exhaustion all play a part in intimate time spent with your husband. Every morning from the moment our feet hit the ground we are running until often late at night when we collapse into bed so tired we can barely move. If this sounds familiar, you may have to be especially creative! Make a date. Try early mornings or middle of the afternoon. Just make it a priority!
There are so many ways you can be creative in the bedroom. Don’t let busyness, children, and frustrations keep you from missing out on one of the most fulfilling parts of your marriage. In the long run, keep the romance alive can keep your marriage alive. Marriages that are not filled with frequent time having some “fun” in the bedroom (or elsewhere) are open to temptation and wandering lusts. As keepers of our homes we have a duty to our husbands and ourselves to keep the romance alive!
God gave us sex. It is a holy, sacred union between a husband and wife that provides so much more than just physical release. It strengthens the bond between you and your husband and connects the two of you in way that no other activity can! Do not neglect this time with your husband!
Today, ask God how you can be the lover your husband desires you to be and ask Him to help you overcome any obstacles that are preventing you from being fully connected to the man you love.
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