The Heart of Her Husband: Day 4

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.” Proverbs 31:11

With Valentine’s Day approaching in just a few days… I thought it would be fun to focus on different aspects of the marriage relationship or rather, how you and I can be better wives! Proverbs 31 tells us that the heart of the virtuous woman’s husband could safely trust in her. Does your husband trust you or does his hear lie in fear of what is coming?

You can read the rest of this series here.

Can your husband trust you?

Trust is one of the most important issues in any relationship. There are many levels of trust. The first idea that comes to my mind when I think of trust is adultery. Whether or not your husband can trust you to stay faithful, to give your heart, mind and body to no one else. Once the threat or reality of an affair has occured, regaining trust can be very difficult and the feeling of betrayal runs deep.

I would imagine that most of you reading this article are not struggling with this type of trust issue. But there are other ways you can give your husband reason to doubt or mistrust you.

• Do you hide your purchases from your husband?
• Do you fail to do the “busy work” he asks you to do? (i.e. phone calls, pick up dry cleaning, etc.)
• Do you not work to keep the house clean so he is unable to spontaneously invite friends or co-workers over?
• Do you have a short temper or critical spirit?
• Do you fail to prepare food for him everyday so he can count on his meals?
• Do you waste money?
• Do you flirt with other men? (however “innocently”)
• Do you speak critically of or to his mother?
• Do you neglect to care properly for his children?

There are so many different ways you can tear down your own house. Only you know the method you are using. Ask God to deliver you from these sins and ask your husband to forgive you as well. Spend time daily in prayer seeking out that meek and quiet spirit that only comes from our Father in Heaven. He can restore the trust in your marriage.

The Heart of Her Husband: Day 3

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.” Proverbs 31:11

With Valentine’s Day approaching in just a few days… I thought it would be fun to focus on different aspects of the marriage relationship or rather, how you and I can be better wives! Proverbs 31 tells us that the heart of the virtuous woman’s husband could safely trust in her. Does your husband trust you or does his hear lie in fear of what is coming?

You can read the rest of this series here.

Are you a home maker?

The Bible tells us that a wise woman builds her home, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands. (Proverbs 14:1) Regardless of whether you work outside the home or are a full-time housewife, God has called you to be the homemaker. Homemaking has such value! Do not undermine the sacredness of what you do – not only for your children, but for your husband as well!

I like how Ellen White says, “Let woman realize the sacredness of her work and, in the strength and fear of God, take up her life mission.”

Home should be the place your husband longs to return after a hard days work. The home should be inviting, loving, warm, free of tension and grief. The husband should be greeted not with a chaotic scence unfolding before as he steps inside the threshold, but rather pleasantness. He should be able to walk in the door and find a neat and orderly home; a clean kitchen with something delicious cooking at supper time; children who are polite and happy to see him; and a wife who smiles and greets him with words of cheer. It may sound idealic and it is. However, it is not impossible!

If you are struggling with homemaking, pray about it! Then, make a plan.

Sit down with a pen and paper and make a plan of action to carry you through each day. You should have a routine that you preform on a daily basis. You should have a routine for morning, afternoon, and evening. Here is an example of a morning routine:

• Wake up early ( 5 or 6 am)
• Prayer and devotion
• Shower
• Cook breakfast, wake up children, eat
• Tidy up kitchen, sweep floor
• Start a load of clothes in washing machine
• Make beds, wipe down bathroom sinks

If your house is in a state of total chaos, make a commitment to begin clearing out the clutter one room at a time. Go to bed every evening with your house clean so that you wake up to a clean house. Then, take a few minutes throughout the day to tidy up. Make it a habit and you’ll find a rhythm that works for you.

Your husband deserves fresh linens on his bed, socks in his drawer, good food on the table, and children who are well mannered. God has commisioned you to do it. Don’t forget my favorite verse, “I can do ALL THINGS through Christ who strengthens me.” (Phil. 4:13)

The Heart of Her Husband: Day 2

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.” Proverbs 31:11

With Valentine’s Day approaching in just a few days… I thought it would be fun to focus on different aspects of the marriage relationship or rather, how you and I can be better wives! Proverbs 31 tells us that the heart of the virtuous woman’s husband could safely trust in her. Does your husband trust you or does his hear lie in fear of what is coming?

You can read the rest of this series here.

Do you pray for your husband?

Do you really pray for your husband? As wives, we should be on our knees every mornings offering petitions on behalf of our spouse. Not selfish prayers (Lord, could you please make him a better husband?) but prayers that are fervent, earnest, and heartfelt.

Your husband leaves home each morning to go to work and will face frustrations and temptations. He needs a covering of prayer. Years ago, I read the book by Stormie Omartian, The Power of a Praying Wife. It is an excellent book you should read if you have not already!

In the first few pages she writes:

“As I sat there, God also impressed upon my heart that if I would deliberately lay down my life before His throne, die to the desire to leave, and give my needs to Him, He would teach me how to lay down my life in prayer for Michael. Ge would show me how to really intercede for him as a son of Hod, and in the process He would revive my marriage and pour His blessings our on both of us….

I began to pray everyday for Michael, like I had never prayed before. Each time, though, I had to confess my own hardness of heart, I saw how deeply hurt and unforgiving of him I was. I don’t want to pray for him. I don’t want to ask God to bless him. I only want God to strike his heart with lightning and convict him of how cruel he has been, I thought. I had to say over and over, “God, I confess my unforgiveness toward my husband. Deliver me from all of it.”

Your prayers for your husband have power. Claim Scripture promises over him. When you have a disagreement with your husband, instead of arguing and raising your voice ask God to give you a meek and quiet spirit. Remember the words of the Bible that a soft voice turns away wrath. Go and pray about it.

There is power in prayer, but you need to have a right spirit. Ask God to forgive you of your own stubborn pride, your own selfish attitude and to create a clean heart within you.

There are so many things you can pray about for your husband. First and foremost, you can ask God to help you to become the wife He wants you to be – the kind of wife your husband needs you to be. Stormie lists thirty different ways to pray for your husband. Some of them include, his work, his finances, his temptations, his health, his priorities, his fatherhood. Think of some of the areas in your own husbands life that you can give some serious prayer attention and write them down.

I like to encourage women to keep a prayer journal. Writing down your prayers will help you stay accountable and focused when praying. Perhaps you would like to make a bookmark with a list of areas in your husband’s life that you can pray about and put it in your prayer journal or Bible. However you decide to pray, make it a daily habit and watch how God will bless your marriage!

The Heart of Her Husband: Day 1

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.” Proverbs 31:11

With Valentine’s Day approaching in just 14 days… I thought it would be fun to focus on different aspects of the marriage relationship or rather, how you and I can be better wives! Proverbs 31 tells us that the heart of the virtuous woman’s husband could safely trust in her. Does your husband trust you or does his hear lie in fear of what is coming?

You can read the rest of this series here.

Do you respect your husband?

Respect goes deeper than just being polite to your husband. Many women do not give their husbands the respect they deserve. The Bible is clear on this subject. As wives we are called to submit to our husbands and show them respect just as the church submits to Christ.This is by far the hardest lesson a wife will ever learn! By our very nature we do not want to submit!

What does it mean to really submit?

Several months ago, I read the book Passionate Housewives Desperate for God. I highly recommend the book! In Chapter 8, The Dangers of Whitewashed Feminism, Stacy McDonald makes this point:

“Regardless of whether or not men obey God faithfully leading and loving their wives, as women, we are still required to obey God by faithfully and respectfully following our own husbands. Our responsibilities to the Lord aren’t contingent upon the obedience of anyone else. We are to submit to our husbands “as unto the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22).

Even when husbands fall short, God can use the faithfulness of godly, submissive wives as a catalyst for change. Peter says it can be done without a word – by our chaste and reverent behavior (1 Peter 3:1-2),

Even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands. (1 Peter 3:4-5)

If a Christian wife is called to submit even to a heathen husband, how much more should she submit to an imperfect Christian husband?”

Whether our husband is the spiritual leader we have always dreamed of or has disappointed our expectations, we have an holy command from Scripture to submit our will to his. Does this mean we never have a voice or should not speak our opinion? No. But there is a difference in demanding our way and stating our opinion with a meek and quiet spirit.

Do you make it easy for your husband to lead? I regrettably made a mistake not so long ago that I wish I could take back. My husband had suggested that we read a particular book during family worship. My instant reaction was that it was not a good idea and I voiced my opinion. I immediately regretted it. I wanted to take the words back, but unfortunately, once something has been said it can’t be undone.

I don’t always think before I speak. I don’t always have a meek and quiet spirit in my home the way I want to – the way I know God wants me to. I want to make it easy for my husband to lead me and our children. When we as wives give up our #1 status and allow our husbands to be the head our home, God will bless us.

Ask yourself some questions:

• Do I allow my husband the freedom to make decisions or do I always insist my way is better?
• Do I treat my husband like he is just another child, incapable of doing anything right?
• Do I belittle my husbands effort (however few) to be the leader of our home?
• Do I punish my husband with words or silence when I don’t get my way?
• Do I insult his intelligence and his dignity with words of wrath?
• Do I harbor anger or resentment toward my husband?
• Do I allow God to opportunity to grow my husband as the head of our home?

Join me over the next two weeks as I work to develop a deeper, stronger faith and a meeker, quieter spirit. You won’t regret it!

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