Seasons of Motherhood
I’ve had five children of my own. I remember the early days, when I just had two and they were little. My oldest child, was quite the handful. I struggled on a daily basis to figure out how to best discipline him, keep him out of trouble, and enjoy being his mom. We used to go to the park every day when the weather was nice. I’d pack a picnic lunch and we’d feed the ducks, and while he played on the playground I’d push Sarah – who was just a year old – in the swing.
I used to say his terrible twos lasted eight years! And at the age of four, he never wanted to leave the park. Even though most days we’d stop at this {mom and pop} old fashioned pharmacy and buy hand dipped ice cream for $0.25 each before going home. A temper tantrum ensued almost every time. Okay, probably every time I told him it was time to go.
It was hard.
I was a young mom {only 19 years old at the time} and it was more than frustrating for me. I hadn’t yet figured out how to best deal with those temper tantrums!
Side Note: If you can relate, you might want to read Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child, Eliminating Conflict by Establishing CLEAR, Firm, and Respectful Boundaries by Robert J. Mackenzie. {affiliate}
Years later, while I was pregnant with my fifth baby, we decided to put our three oldest kids in the public school down the street from our house for a couple of years. I needed a break from homeschooling, the pregnancy was hard on my body and having a two year old was more than enough to take care of during the day.
I remember those days being incredibly easy as far as homemaking went. The house was almost always neat. The kids were not home to make a mess. We didn’t have piles of homeschool books and papers every where. For six hours everyday I just had one child to care for. Evenings were tough, trying to juggle an overload of homework and a child who was struggling in school. But the days were smooth.
By the time we went back to homeschooling, I had two children under the age of two and I was running A Virtuous Woman, publishing a small magazine, and staying very busy as the pastor’s wife of a three church district.
As the years unfolded, some things changed. We had elderly family members to care for and life really became difficult – in a new and different way. I felt like I was losing my joy and that my kids were growing up incredibly fast. I wanted desperately to slow the pace of life and really live in the moment.
Life Changes
We no longer have those elderly family members to take care of. But life is still busy. These days, it’s the music lessons, ice skating lessons, college classes, kids that work, and orthodontist appointments that keep us hopping. It’s a good kind of busy. I’m really enjoying every minute.
There were years when life was really, really hard. There were weeks and months where I wondered if life would ever be satisfying or feel sane.
Kids will try your patience. They will surprise you with uncomfortable questions. They will do things that make your heart worry. Things will happen to your kids that cause you to cry out to God. There will be nights when you can’t sleep because your kids are on your mind.
But, hands-down, being a mom is the greatest gift.
The hardest part for me has been the fact that they are growing up. Life is changing and I want to freeze time. I loved having babies to hold. I loved having young kids to play with and snuggle with. Those memories are precious to me. I will treasure them always. I have cried in the middle of the night on more than one occasion because one of my children was about to turn 18 years old – I now have three kids ages 18, 20, and 23. My youngest two are already 14 and 11.
But you know what? Having teenagers has been such a gift. I have loved getting to know my kids. I’ve loved every adventure we’ve taken together. When I had babies at home, camping was hard and I didn’t do it often. Backpacking 24 miles over several mountains was out of the question. But that’s something I got to do with my girls and I’m grateful for the experience.
I love spending my evenings sitting and talking and laughing with my girls. I love dreaming about the future and listening to their plans. I love working on book ideas with my now 20 year old daughter. I love getting to know my son – so much easier now that he’s grown than when he was a boy. I love encouraging my 14 year old to be the best ice skater she can be and talking sociology with my 18 year who’s in college now and listening to her play the guitar and piano. I love inspiring my 11 year old to be the artist and violinist she wants to be.
I love being a mom. It’s fun and exciting and heart wrenching all at the same time.
They Do Grow Up
Sometimes when your kids are still little – the day to day routine of life can feel suffocating, overwhelming, and like it will never end. Those days are gone before you know it!
[Tweet “The seasons of motherhood will change, but the one constant is how much your children need you.”]
I still struggle to keep the house neat and organized. We’re so busy – housekeeping is hard! But one day… all too soon… this will pass and I will have all the time in the world to have a very neat home.
I’m not looking forward to days of quiet routine. Although, I’m guessing I’ll enjoy every minute of being the mom of all grown and married kids – and grandkids!
Seasons
There are seasons of motherhood when you are tired all the time. There are seasons when your kids are little when life looks different from when your kids are older and more self-sufficient. The seasons of motherhood will change, but the one constant is how much your children need you – even once they’re grown.
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