The Ministry of Homemaking
You can find the rest of the posts in this series here: The Ministry of Homemaking Series.
My life has taken a lot of unexpected turns over the years and I often make mistakes.
Like the other day. Someone let me know I had made a mistake. I got that awful sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach and I felt so embarrassed.
Or that time someone at church said something really hurtful to me. And I just kept rehashing the experience over and over and over again in my mind.
Usually when things go wrong and I feel out of sorts, I can think of a hundred reasons why I should just crawl under a rock and stay there. But when my mind heads in that direction, I know that what I really need to do is pray and ask God to direct my thoughts in a positive direction.
Now, I’m no expert psychologist. So what I’m sharing is really based on my own life experience {and things I’ve read}. But I have found over the years that positive thinking makes a huge difference in how quickly I recover from negative experiences.
I tend to be an optimist. In fact, I like looking at the bright side of things. I like giving people the benefit of the doubt. I tell my girls never to assume the worst – always assume the best – because if you’re assuming anything, that means you really don’t know.
As a pastor’s wife, I have to deal with negative people and criticism on a regular basis. I’ve learned to separate myself from those situations. I don’t take things personally.
In fact, I’ve learned to tell myself, “It’s them. Not me.”
Unless, of course, I really have done something wrong and then I need to be quick to say I’m sorry and be accountable for my own actions.
How Shame Affects Your Mind
My own struggle with shame definitely impacted my homemaking efforts and the way I viewed my own ability to be a homemaker.
To this day, if my home feels messy or out of control, I have to give myself a “positive pep talk” and convince my mind that everything is okay, reminding myself that my worth is not tied to the state of my home. Otherwise I feel overwhelmed, frozen, and unable to change things.
If you have struggled with shame because of past hurts, mistakes, and/or circumstances, I want you to know that you are loved and that you are worth more than you could ever imagine to the God of the universe.
For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Psalm 139:13-15
You are fearfully and wonderfully made by a Creator who loves you enough to send His Son to die for you! You don’t have to be perfect. Jesus’ grace is sufficient enough for you!
Homemaking with Joy
If your home is presently in chaos or you are just feeling tired and overwhelmed, it can be difficult to enjoy homemaking. Positive thinking and “self-talk” can have a huge impact on how you view your life, your home, and your family.
If your mind often lingers toward the negative here are a few ways you can make a positive change:
- Daily Prayer. Studies have shown that people who pray are happier and healthier. Prayer is powerful! Prayer should be our first line of defense instead of our last resort. If you’d like to make your prayer even more powerful, try praying Scripture back to God. Find a verse that reflects your desired change or a promise you want to cling to. As you talk to God, repeat the verse or verses back to God and claim it for yourself. You can’t always expect overnight results, but I can testify that this has worked in my life over and over again!
- Memorize Bible Verses. It’s so important to hide God’s word in your heart. Scripture can bring a weary soul so much comfort! Being able to instantly recall a meaningful verse when you need it will calm your spirit, give you purpose, and help you think more clearly. A great trick is to print out scriptures or hand write them on cards and place them around your home and in your car. Check out my Pinterest Board, Printable Scripture Cards.
- Feed Your Mind the Good Stuff. What you read and watch on television affects your mind in ways that we probably don’t even realize. If you watch a movie that lifts your spirits, you’ll feel happy afterward. If you watch a movie with no redeeming value or that leaves your spirit feeling unsettled, you’ll feel that too. The Bible tells us, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” Philippians 4:8
- Have fun. When I went through burn-out a few years ago, I knew I needed to make some positive changes in my life that would help me once again find my joy. I made the decision to spend time everyday laughing with my kids. Whether we are playing a board game, watching a funny video on YouTube, on a walk or hike, or just talking, spending time just relaxing, having fun, and being together is one of my top priorities every day.
Like I said before, homemaking is about so much more than just cleaning and organizing. It’s about the atmosphere in your home. It’s about creating a home environment that is full of the good stuff: warmth, comfort, joy, laughter, forgiveness, peace, acceptance, and kindness. And all of those emotions, feelings, and actions begin with a positive mindset.
When you exchange negative thoughts for positive ones, the impact on your home and family will be incredible. So remember, if you catch yourself talking negative to yourself, mentally or even verbally say . Negative self talk comes from the Father of Lies, the Devil. And we don’t want to give Satan any power over our lives.
Jesus will have the victory here.
Home Work
Answers these questions below in a journal or notebook. Or, download my journaling page here.
- What kinds of words do you often say to yourself? Do words from your past, maybe names you’ve been called, come to mind when you make a mistake?
- Write down three things you need to change in the way you think.
- What are three things in your life you need to give yourself grace with RIGHT NOW.
- Are there people in your life that cause you to feel unworthy or inadequate? How can you set boundaries for those people? {Let me know if you have questions about this in the comments below.}
- Look up these verses and write them down: Colossians 3:2, Romans 12:2, John 10:10
- What is God speaking to your heart through these verses?
Have you struggled with having a positive mindset? Let me know your thoughts or any questions you have in the comments below!
Be sure to follow my popular board on Pinterest, Printable Scripture Cards.
Follow Melissa Ringstaff {AVirtuousWoman.org}’s board Printable Scripture Cards on Pinterest.
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