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What Does It Mean to Make a Home @ AVirtuousWoman.org #homemaking #proverbs31

What Does It Mean to Make a Home?

This post may contain affiliate links. You can read my disclosure policy here.

I’m so excited about today’s post. This is the first post in my new series, 30 Days of Intentional Homemaking. Today I’m talking about what it really means to make a home. What does it mean to make a home? I’m so glad you asked! Let’s take a look together.

What Does It Mean to Make a Home @ AVirtuousWoman.org #homemaking #proverbs31

30 Days of Intentional Homemaking: Day 1

Families need women who make home a special place to live, learn, and grow. There is no other job that presents as many opportunities for shaping {for the good or the bad} the future of our country – of our world – than that of a homemaker.

Each of us is a homemaker. Whether you work outside the home or stay home full time, you are a homemaker. Whether you live with a big boisterous family or it’s just you and a couple of children – or just you and your husband, you are a homemaker. We’ve all been called to the ministry of homemaking.

What does it mean to make a home?

So, what does it mean to make a home?

Homemaking is a noble work. In fact, despite our culture’s often negative portrayal of homemaking and women who make a home, do you know anyone who doesn’t appreciate a home that is well tended, cared for, warm and inviting? Who doesn’t love to crawl into a freshly made bed after a hard day or open their drawers to find clean socks and underwear?

Homemaking is the work of the woman who cares tenderly for her children when they are in distress. It is the work of the loving wife as she prepares her husband’s favorite meal. It is the work of the woman who folds the laundry in preparation for a full week of busy activities. It is the work of the woman who sets the table and calls her family to eat. It is the work of a woman who bends down on her knees and prays with her children.

Making a home is about so much more than just keeping a house neat and tidy although that is certainly an important aspect of homemaking.

Making a home is about creating a space that feels like home. A space that welcomes weary souls into it’s warmth. A space that provides a safe atmosphere for children to learn, love, and grow. It is about creating special memories and traditions that are passed on from generation to generation.

What do you think of when you think of home? Perhaps you have a few favorite memories of your own childhood home.

  • That favorite meal your mother always prepared.
  • Birthday celebrations.
  • The way your father folded his hands in prayer.
  • Relaxing in front of the television together after a long day.
  • Playing board games at every holiday gathering.

Whatever those memories are, they all comprise the meaning of home to you. On the other hand, maybe you came from a difficult family situation and your memories of home are jaded and unhappy. That hurts and perhaps you even struggle with creating a happy home today because you didn’t have the best example growing up. You can move past those hurt feelings by creating your own happy home today.

Creating a Happy Home

There are a few components that can help make a happy home:

  • unconditional love
  • patience
  • an atmosphere of acceptance
  • healthy boundaries
  • a reasonable set of rules to live by
  • laughter
  • meals around the table
  • a tidy, organized space
  • faith in Jesus

It’s important that we offer those who live in our home love, patience, and acceptance. Everyone needs to know they are loved and accepted and allowed to make mistakes.

“Love is patient, love is kind…” 1 Corinthians 13:4

I’ve said this before, but the real key to patience is valuing the other person so much that nothing is more important than your relationship. It’s not always easy to love your family members unconditionally. People can be down right difficult. Some people are really hard to love. But how much we all need to be loved!

Setting Healthy Boundaries

That’s where setting up healthy boundaries comes in to play. Having healthy boundaries means that there are limits to what is okay and what is not okay. “Personal boundaries are are the physical, emotional and mental limits we establish to protect ourselves from being manipulated, used, or violated by others.” – source: Essential Life Skills Hopefully you are not in a situation where people you love regularly take advantage of you.

Creating a home that feels safe and loving for those who live there means that there are boundaries people don’t cross. Boundaries are as simple as respecting another persons space and personal belongings, respecting another person’s right to be independent, respecting another person’s right to make choices and make mistakes. Basically, when we respect each other through our words and actions we are also acknowledging appropriate boundaries.

Boundaries are also important not for just adults, but for children too. Children who are raised in homes where healthy boundaries are established are happier and well adjusted. Children need to know what’s okay and what’s not okay. They need to have reasonable rules imposed so that they learn self-control, responsibility, respect, and right from wrong.

Laughter

Nothing makes a home happier than laughter. Every home should be filled with laughter, joy, and a sense of belonging that comes with camaraderie. Whether you laugh together at a silly joke, or tell a funny story, or play games on the floor, laughter brings delight and joy to everyone who experiences it. I can’t encourage you enough to find ways every day to laugh together. Laughter helps to reduce stress and anxiety and the Bible says that a cheerful heart is like medicine to the bones!

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength. Proverbs 17:22

Meals Around the Table

Studies have shown that children who grow up in homes where eating together is a common occurrence are happier, healthier, do better in school, and are less likely to get involved in dangerous activities like drugs and alcohol. Sitting together around the table and sharing a meal brings people closer together. Families are more likely to communicate and share about their day when sharing a meal. Food often brings people together. Think about all the special celebrations and traditions that involve food. Mealtime is a time to come together, relax for a little while, and nourish our bodies and souls.

As a homemaker, providing meals that are healthy but taste good is an important task and worthy of time and energy spent planning and preparing for mealtime. Think about it. We all have to eat every single day. Food is very important. Without good food, our bodies suffer. Without meals around the table our relationships suffer.

A tidy, organized space.

Homemaking, as well all know, definitely involves a good deal of housekeeping. The work never ends – from laundry that piles up daily, to dishes that fill the sink, to all the clutter and stuff that can fill our homes, homemaking can be exhausting.

But don’t think that these tasks are not important. Creating a space that feels like home means that you work to create a space that is comfortable to live in. Comfort is perhaps subjective – some people are only comfortable in a space that is very neat, while others are okay with some clutter.

I would like to suggest though that a neat space, not perfect, is important to everyone whether they admit to it or not. Studies have shown that children who live in a neat home do better in school and are more successful overall. Studies have also shown that children who live in messy homes where chaos is normal are more likely to have behavior problems.

The child who grows up in a home that is tidy, has basic schedules and routines set in place, knows what to expect, eats regular meals three times a day is more likely to be organized, do well in school, and feel secure in their environment. But think about the child who grows up in total chaos – there’s never clean laundry, meal times are sporadic, and there’s no set routine for the day is more likely to feel unsure about their day, struggle to be responsible, and feel stress on a daily basis. They are also more likely to have behavior problems.

She looks well to the ways of her household. Proverbs 31:27

Homemaking is important! Never think that the unseen work of your hands is of little impact. Every time you serve your family by cooking a meal, cleaning a room, or doing the laundry you are nurturing your family’s mental and physical well being.

Faith in Jesus

And finally, faith in Jesus creates an atmosphere of love and belonging in a home. As you work to make your home a place of love, do not neglect to spend time each day in prayer and worship. It’s important for us as homemaker’s to make worship a priority. That  can mean we spend a few minutes in personal prayer each morning. It’s also important that we teach our children what it means to follow Jesus.

These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. Deuteronomy 6:6,7

Teach your children what it means to be a Christ follower. Show them by example. Pray for your husband and children. Pray together. Show them grace when they need it and say you’re sorry when you are wrong. Demonstrate the love of Christ in everything you do.

The Ministry of Homemaking

We’ve looked at a number of aspects on what does it mean to make a home. Being a homemaker is a sacred calling. We are all called to the ministry of homemaking. I hope you’ll join me tomorrow as well look at the next topic in this series, 30 Days of Intentional Homemaking.

Tell me what home means to you in the comments below!

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About Melissa Ringstaff

My name is Melissa Ringstaff and I've been blogging here at A Virtuous Woman since 2001. I'm a pastor's wife and homeschooling mom living in the beautiful Appalachian Mountains of Southeastern KY. I believe in finding freedom from perfection and living life with purpose and I want to help you do exactly that.

I'm so glad you've stopped by to visit with me. I hope we can be friends!

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Sheri

    April 16, 2018 at 6:53 pm

    This is an area for me that I find extremely challenging. I have grown up without the knowledge of what a takes, or how to contribute to making a home. Having a series of struggles myself has meant that our house tends to be one of chaos. But I want it to be a home. Not just a house where people sleep eat and store their things. I guess in answer to your question - homemaking is an elusive goal for me, and I'm not sure how to do it with long work hours and a long commute every day. But I want to make a home that is tidy, organised, peaceful and full of love. That is full of light (and Light). Where people can be refreshed and ready to face a new day. I'm still trying to work out how to make that happen.
    Reply
    • Raising Sparrows

      May 3, 2018 at 1:50 am

      You sound like me. Except for the long commute, instead I sound 3/4 hours a day homeschooling. . But I get overwhelmed easily.
      Reply
  2. Kathy Cervantes

    April 17, 2018 at 11:53 am

    Love this article. It gave me wings for today. Sometimes being a homemaker can seem meaningless but nothing can be further from the truth. Thank you for the refreshing words. Now if only I can get rid of the perfectionist attitude that takes over. ; )
    Reply

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purposenotperfection

Freedom from perfection. 🪁
Live with purpose. ✝️
Proverbs 31 for modern women. 👱‍♀️
Wife + Mama + Homemaker + Kentucky
Life: @melissa.ringstaff

Melissa Ringstaff
Not gonna lie. 2020 was a hard year. And not just Not gonna lie. 2020 was a hard year. And not just because there was a pandemic. Our family has faced many trying times in the past but 2020 gave us some doozies.  I’m looking forward to a new year. The beginning of the new year always feels like a fresh start to me. It feels like HOPE.  But the truth is, whatever heartaches and hardships you and I were facing on Dec. 31 will most likely still be there on Jan. 1.  That’s why it’s hard to keep New Years resolutions. It’s easy to feel motivated for a few days or a couple weeks until we realize life hasn’t really changed and things are still hard.  But if we want to see real change it takes hard work and real effort. It takes showing up every day - even when it’s hard.  Whether that means working on your fractured relationships or setting healthy boundaries or cultivating self disciple... whatever that hard thing is that you need to work on ... it will only get better if you work on it.  We aren’t promised an easy life. But we are promised an “Ever Present Help in times of trouble.” Psalm 46:1  *
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#faithblogger #faithfulness #faithandfamily #bibleverseaday #christianbloggers #dailyverses #christianlife #jesuscalling #shereadstruth#proverbs31women #proverbs31life #10virtues #daughteroftheking #jesuslovesme #womenoffaith #faithquotes #proverbs31
We’re coming into the new year with all the same We’re coming into the new year with all the same problems we had in the last year. And that’s okay! Life doesn’t have to be perfect to still be amazing. Perfectionism is a joy stealer. Let’s determine to enjoy life right now in all its messiness.  I believe you can find freedom from perfection and the confidence to live your life with purpose. #purposenotperfection  #christian #Jesus #love #quotes #quoteslife #quotestoliveby #godisgood #votd #lifequotes #inspirationalquotes #life #motivationalquotes #inspiration #bible #bb #bestoftheday #happiness #wordofgod
🏠 Being a homemaker is such an important role. 🏠 Being a homemaker is such an important role. It’s a ministry to your family and all who enter your home.  But I want you to know: You don’t have to be perfect. ❤️  There’s a fine line between teaching your children to be neat and insisting on perfection. No one can meet that kind of standard and it can be detrimental to the emotional health of your family.  What we want for our homes is to provide a space that is neat and clean enough that your family and friends feel comfortable and well loved.  There is freedom in accepting the fact that you’re not perfect. Not to make excuses for slovenliness - but to give yourself grace.  It’s when we recognize our weakness that we find ourselves reaching out to Jesus to receive the power that comes only from him. As homemakers, when we can find grace for the moment when we accept His Gift.  “But now for a brief moment grace has been shown from the LORD our God, to leave us an escaped remnant and to give us a peg in His holy place, that our God may enlighten our eyes and grant us a little reviving in our bondage. Ezra 9:8  Let His Grace wash over you, cleanse your weary heart. Homemaking isn’t about creating a perfect space. It’s about creating a home where loved ones feel cared for and nurtured. 
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#proverbs31 #proverbs31woman #purpose31 #10virtues #homemaking #homemakingministries #happyhomemaking #homemaking101 #cleanhome #cleanheart #fromchaostocalm #housekeeping #cleaningroutine #inspiredhome #makingahome #lovewhereyoudwell #homemaker #homebody #biblicalHomemaking #wearethehomemakers
❤️Your attitude about homemaking matters.⠀
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A homemaker by definition is someone who manages and makes a home. 🏠⠀
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But, anyone can clean and organize a home. ⠀
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☑️ Homemaking is about more than checking off the items on your to do list.⠀
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Learning how to be a homemaker means you learn how to make your home feel like haven of peace and love. You seek out ways to make your home feel inviting. You work at it.⠀
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There is no easy button for homemaking. There are easier, more efficient ways to do chores, but the chores still have to be done. If you live in a house, you will create the need for the house to be tidied every day and cleaned on a regular basis.⠀
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Having the right attitude about homemaking is the first step in learning how to be a homemaker.⠀
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The good news is, even if you’ve been struggling with your homemaking, you can always go to God and ask Him for help. ⠀
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He sees the unseen work of your hands. And He loves you very, very much. He wants to help you succeed. ⠀
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#proverbs31 #proverbs31woman #purpose31 #10virtues #homemaking #homemakingministries #happyhomemaking #homemaking101 #cleanhome #cleanheart #fromchaostocalm #housekeeping #cleaningroutine #inspiredhome #makingahome #lovewhereyoudwell #homemaker #homebody #biblicalHomemaking  #youngwife #housewife
🙏 If you’ve found it difficult to have a regu 🙏 If you’ve found it difficult to have a regular time with Jesus every day, you’re not alone. Lots of busy Christian women struggle to find time for a daily prayer and devotion time. ⠀
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But I still want to encourage you to start your day with God! ⠀
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⏰ If it’s hard to spend 30 minutes in the morning for a quiet time, I want you to remember you can still begin your day with God – even if that means saying a short prayer before your feet hit the floor in the morning.⠀
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✝️ I also want to encourage you to memorize this verse:⠀
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“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.⠀
Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.” Psalm 143:8 📖⠀
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In the morning you can recite this verse and say a prayer. It doesn’t have to take a long time. Although – if you do have time – you will be greatly blessed by spending more time in prayer and devotion.⠀
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📌 Free Printable Morning Prayer Prompts on the blog today: https://avirtuouswoman.org/morning-prayer-prompts/  #linkinbio ⠀
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#faithblogger #faithfulness #faithandfamily #bibleverseaday #christianbloggers #dailyverses #christianlife #jesuscalling #shereadstruth #Christ #Church #Christian #Jesus #Jesuslover #JesusChrist #JesusisLord #CreatorGod #Devotional #verseoftheday #Love #Faith #biblestudy #God #dailydevotional
🏠 As a homemaker, one of my goals is to be inte 🏠 As a homemaker, one of my goals is to be intentional with how I plan our days. I love any opportunity to create a good memories at home for my family and guests. ⠀⠀
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📌 If you're looking to make this holiday season really special, you need to be intentional. Goodness knows 2020 has had a lot of ups and downs. And maybe you feel like it's been mostly downs. ⠀⠀
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🎄 But the holiday season is a chance to focus on celebrating the life we have right now. Things don't need to be perfect for us to celebrate life right now!!⠀⠀
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☑️ Inside the pages of my Purpose 31 holiday planner, you'll find 8 weeks of planning and cleaning all laid out for you. Recipe pages, journaling pages, and more - 120 pages total. ⠀⠀
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✏️ The Purpose 31 Holiday Planner is by far one of the most popular resource I produce each year. ⠀⠀
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Thousands of women have downloaded it over the last four years I've offered it.⠀⠀
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So, even though it's early still, you can go ahead and downlaod it. Print it out and then set it up so you're ready to go.⠀⠀
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I usually take my holiday planner down to Office Depot and have them spiral bind it with a plastic cover for about $5.00. This year, though, I just bought a new 3 ring binder at Walmart, printed off extra cover pages to slip in the clear sleeve, and created a binder with it. ⠀⠀
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📌📌📌 If you use the planner this year, be sure to share and tag me in your photos! ❤️⠀  Download: https://avirtuouswoman.org/holiday-planner/ #linkinbio
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#proverbs31 #proverbs31woman #purpose31 #10virtues #homemaking #homemakingministries #happyhomemaking #homemaking101 #cleanhome #cleanheart #fromchaostocalm #housekeeping #cleaningroutine #inspiredhome #makingahome #lovewhereyoudwell #homemaker #homebody #biblicalHomemaking #christmas #holidayplanning #planningaddict #plannercommunity #freeprintables #thanksgiving #christmastree  #plannerobsessed
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