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A Comely Woman | Day 18

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Welcome to Day 18 of our series, From Chaos to Calm: 15 Weeks to a Happy Home. Today we’re talking about dressing in a way that honors yourself and honors God.

From Chaos to Calm: Day Eighteen

A Comely Woman

Scripture Memory: “I have likened the daughter of Zion to a comely and delicate woman.” Jeremiah 6:2

The way a woman dresses says a lot about how she sees herself. Look around a crowded shopping mall and you will see many different styles of dress.

So, my question for you today is this: When you look in the mirror, when you put on your clothes for the day, what do you see? What are you saying to others?

How we dress is very much a part of our personality. Our dress conveys a message to others and not always the message we intend. Consider these messages:

  • I am an overworked new mother.
  • I don’t care about the way I look.
  • I care too much about the way I look.
  • I like attention.
  • I am like the rest of the world.
  • I am a clothes horse.
  • I want to be noticed.

We have all heard it said that “pretty is as pretty does.” It is so important to be a kind and loving woman! No one wants to be around a mean-spirited woman – no matter how pretty she is on the outside!

A Comely Woman {From Chaos to Calm: 15 Weeks to a Happy Home: Day 18} @ AVirtuousWoman.org

The Bible gives us some guidelines for how we should dress:

“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands.” 1 Peter 3:1 – 5

Holy women should not display themselves in a way that would not glorify God. A woman’s attire should be understated, lovely, and modest.

“In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array.” 1 Timothy 2:9

By today’s standards, it can be difficult to find clothing that is not too tight, not too short, or not too sensual. It is important that we choose clothes that will bring glory and honor to our Father in Heaven.

I have seen Christian women who wear too much makeup and too much jewelry and I feel it definitely takes away from the message of the Humble Servant who came and died for us. Wearing too much jewelry or too much makeup or dressing in a flashy way suggests to me that a woman wants to be noticed – not for her meek and quiet spirit, but for her good looks or her material wealth.

I have also seen young women who dress in a sensual, sexy way. They want men to look at them with desire. Or at least that is the message they are sending! Do you dress with this in mind?

And then there are other women who dress without much thought and look unkempt. Just as being overly flashy takes away from the message of Christ, dressing in a way that makes you look like you do not care, that you are sloppy, or that you are unfeminine is unbecoming a woman of God.

As a Christian, you are to represent Christ here on earth! What an awesome responsibility that is! Do not take it lightly. Your outward appearance is the first thing a person notices about you. Take care to choose garments that are becoming your figure and your faith!

More Resources:

Action Steps to Take Today

  1. Pray and talk to God about the way you dress and listen to His voice leading.
  2. Think about how you typically dress on any given day and decide if there is anything you want or need to change.
  3. Write in your jounral any ideas you have about how you can dress in a way that is God honoring while also being true to your sense of style and personality.

 What tips do you have for keeping your appearance nice?

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  1. Following this devotional and praying without ceasing has transformed my marriage in just a few short weeks! Than you so much!
  2. Does this verse mean women are supposed to wear a dress 24/7/365 ? Deuteronomy 22:5 The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God.
    1. Hi Pauline, I believe that women should dress in a modest and feminine way. I personally don't believe that women "must" wear dresses or skirts to be in accordance with Scripture. I shop in the women's section, not the men's. In Bible times both men and women wore robes. So how did they know whether the robes were feminine or masculine? The same way I know when shopping for clothes. Of course, I would encourage any woman who feels convicted to wear skirts to do so. God bless you in your walk!
  3. This is a subject I've never thougjt of in this way before. I agree with you on the whole pants/skirts issue, and I know about modesty etc. But I've never thought of the too much makeup or jewelry thing. In fact it took me all day of praying then hearing the podcast to get it. I'm a cosmetologist. I believe strongly on a person caring about their appearance. However, I've also had rainbow and multicolored hair (many an open door for ministering to girls this way) and I used to wear a lot of bright bold rainbow makeup too in school. I didn't see a problem with. And was questioning what you said like crazy. But when I was listening to the podcast, God spoke to me. There is a time and place where it is okay, plays, holiday events etc. But on a daily basis, as an aspiring proverbs 31 woman, it is no longer appropriate for me. And I'm actually ok with that. Thank you.
    1. Ayron, dress is such a personal thing. There's nothing wrong with taking time each day to make ourselves look attractive. It's possible to dress in a trendy fashion while maintaining our modesty and modesty really is more than just not showing too much skin. Modest has several meanings including moderate or limited as well as avoiding impropriety or indecency. The way we dress should never take away from the message of Christ - who lived and dressed in a humble way. Makeup {I do wear some} and jewelry {I personally don't wear} are adornments. For instance, I live in a poverty stricken community - I'm talking extremely poor people - what message would it send if I or my family dressed in the latest fashions, wore expensive looking jewelry, etc. Or a better question - What would Jesus do? It's just something to think about. We each need to seek out God's will for every detail of our lives. I think it's wonderful that you've been searching and seeking God's will for your life and I know God will bless you abundantly because of it. God bless you!
  4. Hi Melissa, I have enjoyed everyday of this daily devotion(even the tough days). Its really been a blessing to me. I have a question about makeup. I wear makeup almost everyday. I dont do it for people. I do it because I just find pleasurable to do and also my husband likes it. Like today I dont wear make up sometimes. Now what is too much makeup because I put it on an make it look really natural. It just really enhances my beauty. Just trying to know what is too much makeup?
    1. Sharita, I wear a little makeup to. I have really bad skin {always have} and I feel more confident when I wear some makeup to cover the redness and blotchy look of my skin. Everyone has to make this decision for themselves, but I would think you're not wearing too much if it looks natural. I think an even bigger issue for some women is that they spend hours in front of the mirror everyday. I'm not sure that would be God-honoring, but we each have to search our own hearts. :)
  5. Frugality is learned. When I shop for myself for clothes I have to have a what is a need. Right now I'm loosing weight. I had steriods to "save my life" when I was ran over. Well that made me gain over 100 lbs. So now that I don't have to take them any longer the weight is coming off. PTL. So I have most of my clothes in stages...LOL. Doesn't fit...want to tske it in....bou h ht by the husband so the wife would have something that fits but it doesn't match anything but you would hurt his feelings to donate it....and fits and matches... Hints 1. Need 2 matches the wardrobe basics 3. Made, restyled, repurposed 4 stay with in allowed clothing dollars
  6. Hi Melissa! I've gradually been working my way through FC2C and what a blessing it's been! Many of these things The Lord convicted me of years ago, but it's always good to get a refresher! This is my 1st time commenting. I've wanted to on some of the other subjects but this was the 1st time I really felt I had something to possibly offer your readers in the way of a testimony, so here goes... In high school I became obsessed with fashion and dressing in a way that would get me noticed but at this point, it's a desire I believe The Lord has taken from me (for the most part!). I rely a lot on my husbands input. If I step out of the closet and his eyes bug out like the big bad wolf, than I know it's too much and other men might be tempted likewise. I still enjoy keeping an eye out for what's considered fashionable but feel it's been tempered with the ability to discern what is reasonable in the sight of my husband and Saviour. Tips I would give others are to ask your husband to shop with you and trust when he vetoes something because it does not become you, is to revealing, etc. Make fashion goals and than pray about them. I have a clothing budget that I really strive to adhere to and if the money isn't there, I take it as a sign. Many times I've been rewarded with assurance that my money was better spent elsewhere. There's so much more I could share but will just leave it at this for now! Hope this blesses and encourages someone struggling in this area... PS ~ I really appreciate how attentive you are to your readers. It's really a testimony to this blogs ministry and your heart for other woman. I have often prayed, thanking God for inspiring you, since beginning this series. God's continued favor on you in this endeavor!
    1. Hi Kendra, I'm so glad you've been going through the From Chaos to Calm series and I really appreciate your suggestions regarding dress. It can be so difficult sometimes to figure everything out. Thanks for sharing your your heart on this!
  7. But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Matthew 6:25-34 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again KJB Mathew 7:2 A Virtuous woman read proverbs 31
  8. Melissa, this has been my favorite study yet. I love all of the practical tools that you have given. I thanked my hubby today, after this devotional, for being a man who leads me to be a better Proverbs 31 woman. He is not a fan of a lot of makeup and will absolutely tell me when I am wearing too much. It's not anything I ever thought to thank him for before. Truth be told, many times, I was offended by it. This study today has convicted me that my husband, unknowingly, is making sure that my Spirit shines brighter than my makeup. Be blessed and enjoy the snow later today!
  9. Thank you so much for biblical information about how to approach our attire as outward witness. I wholeheartedly agree that women should be modest but sometimes it can be a challenge to find clothing that is not revealing etc.

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