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Depending on God when Life is Hard

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If you’ve lived long enough, you understand that life can be very hard. Homemaking, when life is hard, is no small feat. It’s those times of stress, grief, and uncertainty that we need God more than ever. But depending on God when life is hard isn’t always easy. Today I’m talking about how to depend on God when life is hard.

How to Depend on God when Life is Hard @ AVirtuousWoman.org

30 Days Of Intentional Homemaking: Day 9

Families need women who make home a special place to live, learn, and grow. There is no other job that presents as many opportunities for shaping (for the good or the bad) the future of our country – of our world – than that of a homemaker.

Intentional Homemaking @ AVirtuousWoman.org

Each of us is a homemaker. Whether you work outside the home or stay home full time, you are a homemaker. Whether you live with a big boisterous family or it’s just you and a couple of children – or just you and your husband – or even just you -, you are a homemaker. We’ve all been called to the ministry of homemaking.

You can find the rest of this series here.

➡️ Download today’s workbook here.

Note: I originally wrote this in 2018.

I haven’t talked about this, but over the last few months, my husband’s health has radically taken a turn for the worse. Where he used to have lots of energy and was always on the go, these days he’s in terrible pain 24/7 with very little relief found. He can hardly walk to the bathroom or to the kitchen without breaking down emotionally from the pain, and continuing his work as a pastor is a battle.

This morning he left home, determined to make his visits for the day to pray for people and encourage them. I encouraged him to stay home, but he said he was sure God would give him the strength. I’m not sure it will get better and we are probably looking at him needing to get a wheelchair. I don’t fully understand it, but on top of several other health issues, the bones in the balls of his feet have collapsed and walking is excruciating and seems to get worse every day.

Depending on God when Life is Hard

For a number of years, I was a homemaker faced with the increasing demands of caring for elderly family members – four of them at once – and then three, then just two, and then finally none. Being a caregiver while also trying to raise a family can be really hard. And if you are in the midst of that kind of situation and have been there – you know what I’m talking about.

I went from having a pretty predictable routine to every day seeming to be a crazy mix of frustration, obligations, and stress with very little downtime.

I’ve also had years when my chronic illness kept me in bed for months at a time – and it was hard. Especially since during those years, I had five young children to care for. (Looking back now, I think much of my illness and autoimmune issues were due to stress.)

I also have a daughter with Crohn’s Disease {Sarah} and for two years before she got married, she was extremely ill, had to have a colon resection, and needed constant care. After the surgery, she had complications and ended up with a very large abscess in her abdomen that could have killed her. It took months for her to regain her strength.

Life is hard. It can be a bitter pill to swallow.

Sometimes there are circumstances that are beyond your control. It’s hard to accept. Because as humans, I think we naturally just really want to be in control of everything all the time. At least, that’s how I feel. I like feeling like I’m in control.

And when we feel like life is a chaotic mess and we’re out of control it’s frightening.

I am no stranger to difficult circumstances. And there have been years when I wasn’t sure I could go on. I don’t always talk about it – and I’ve been writing here at A Virtuous Woman since 2001. These last two decades have had a lot of heartaches.

But lots of joy too.

In all honesty, there have been times when I questioned God’s plan – why he would allow me to go through so much for so many years. And yet, I know some people have it much worse than I ever had.

I have been very, very blessed over the years and I’m so thankful that my children are well and that my family is still together.

Depending on God when life is hard will help you press on in the midst of trials and will bring you comfort when your heart is grieving – whether that grief is the loss of a loved one, the loss of a dream you had, or the loss of the life you thought you’d live.

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

Sometimes God doesn’t answer our prayers the way we want Him to. I know this from experience. I don’t always understand why He allows us to walk through the valley of the shadow of death for long periods of time. But, often it’s through these trials and valleys that we learn to depend fully on Him.

The truth is, I’m not in control. No matter how much I want to be in control, ultimately, I am at the mercy of things that are beyond my control.

Yes, I can make plans. I can try to see those plans come to fruition. I can work hard and sometimes those plans will pan out. Other times, nothing I do seems to work.

And that’s okay. Because God is still in control.

There is no easy button for homemaking when life is hard. I wish there was! Sometimes we just have to do the best we can and accept that some things will just not get done on our schedule. 

That’s why we need to be willing to accept God’s grace for the moment. Putting systems and routines in place will help make things a little easier and we’ll be talking about all of those things soon!

My living room is pretty messy right now. But I know that this afternoon, part of our routine is to straighten things up and get it back in shape. It will only take a few minutes of combined effort. Because I have a basic routine and tasks that I do on the same days each week {when I’m able} I know that even when life is hard and things are stressful, I can still create an atmosphere of love, peace, and comfort in my home.

And I can trust that God is in control even when it seems like my life is crazy and out of control. There is grace for this moment – even when life is hard.

5 Ways to Depend on God when Life is Hard

#1 Be Thankful

Being thankful for the blessings you do have is an important part of emotionally and spiritually getting through a rough time in your life. Having a grateful heart can really help you keep things in focus on not feel like God has abandoned you.

You might want to keep a gratitude journal. You can download my free printable gratitude journal here.

#2 Spend time in Prayer

Pray and cry out to God every day. You don’t have to only pray at any set time. You can talk to God – really converse with Him all day long! Begin your day with prayer and reading His Word and then continue those thoughts and prayers all day.

You’ll find comfort and peace you haven’t experienced before. Give Jesus all of your hurt and worry. The Bible tells us that He will carry all of it for us!

#3 Read Through the Psalms 

If you are going through a difficult trial, you might want to read through the Psalms. I know my husband began reading through the Psalms again when he became sick and it’s brought him a lot of courage and comfort. The Psalms have so many beautiful and hopeful verses that are perfect for the hurting soul. You may want to read through the Psalm during your morning devotions. Just read a chapter a day.

#4 Replace the Worry

I’m terrible about overthinking my problems. If I’m not distracted, I can worry for hours on end. A  good friend of mine told me to practice replacing all of those negative thoughts with positive ones.

So when I catch myself dwelling on everything that has gone wrong or could go wrong, I try to remind myself to think good thoughts and replace those negative ones with positive ones.

#5 Memorize Scripture

Memorizing Scriptures that bring you comfort and peace is a great way to dwell on the promises of God and depend on him with life is hard. Some great verses to get you started are:

  • Exodus 14:14
  • Joshua 1:9
  • John 14:26, 27
  • Psalm 34:17, 18
  • 2 Corinthians 9:10

Depending on God when life is hard means that you learn to trust Him even when the outcome is uncertain. You claim His promises to give you an abundant life even in the midst of pain and sorrow. It’s about trusting Him no matter what.

Though He slay me, yet will I trust him. Job 13:15

He is faithful and just and His mercies are new every morning. If you are going through a difficult time or life has been hard for a long time, I want you to know you are not alone. God loves you very much. Feel free to shoot me an email and share your story with me.

I had to learn the hard way how to say no with grace … so I had room in my life to say yes to the best! Intentional Homemaking isn’t just about cleaning your house – although a clean house is nice!

Rather, Intentional Homemaking is about creating a life that you love and creating a space that feels like home.

Because home is where real life happens.

  • home is where the people you love gather to encourage each other and grow together
  • home is where your friends come to bond over cookies and milk
  • home is where your children learn what it means to be an honorable human being
  • home is where you nurse your sick loved ones and care for their hurting hearts
  • home should be a respite from this harsh world and a haven for the wounded spirit

Action Steps to Take Today

  1. Right now, pray and ask God to help you trust Him more. Ask Him to help you depend on Him, even more, when life is hard.
  2. Print out my free printable Scripture Cards below, if desired. Cut them out and place around your home or somewhere where you will see them.
  3. Hide God’s Word in your heart! Memorize Scriptures that comfort you when life is hard.
  4. Download today’s workbook pages and fill out the worksheets.

Free Printable Scripture Cards

Scriptures for the Hurting Heart @ AVirtuousWoman.org

How to Download

  1. Just fill out the form below and you’ll receive an email giving you access to my subscriber exclusive resource library.
  2. You’ll find these printable Scripture Cards and many more resources for your home and family in my library!

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6 Comments

  1. Hello, I have read through your post. I am so thankful you do not blame God for you and your and family's challenges of health. God is good and that is who He is not just that He is always good. I am also glad to read that God did not put this on you... He didn't. As a child I kept saying I wanted to get married, go to bible school with my husband, and go to Africa to tell people about Jesus. (I still wonder where some of these thoughts came from since I only went to church once as a child and He has not revealed it to me yet) So my 2nd husband and I attended Charis Bible College together in 2009 t0 2014. Afterwards is when lots of health issues really hit us and hit us HARD. We know God is Good, so what was going on we were not sure. The short story is we are now are walking in a RESTing time with the Lord. My husband received disability and I get paid to be his 24 hour caregiver here at our home. ( I was in a 4 year SER job training program, but felt to quit in 18 months to be home with my husband) So please continue to stand fast!! Our prayers are with you and our God is in us!!! Cheryl
  2. I'm a relatively new follower so I don't know if you already practice this, but when I was hit with debilitating fatigue and body pain going gluten free, dairy free, and soy free was a lifesaver for me. It made such a difference that I can't NOT say something when I hear someone else going through physical health issues. I don't know if it will help your husband, but it might. I'll pray for you. Health is one of the most sacred gifts.
    1. Thank you for sharing what worked for you, Gwen. My husband has been eating a very strict diet the last few months. We are hoping and praying he will find some relief. God bless you!
  3. Thank you for this post. It really hit home for me. We found out about a week and a half ago that my mom has metastasis disease of the spine. We believe it is late stage breast cancer that has spread to the bones in her lower back. She has been in excruciating pain since mid-January, barely able to move and hardly able to sleep. She is actually at an appointment with an oncologist right now, and after I prayed for her, I saw this post in my email. I needed the encouragement. Thank you.

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